There's nothing subtle about domestic violence. And it won't ever go away unless women stop pretending what is, ain't so. I wonder ... when is enough, enough?!

What I’ve come to discover in my few years of working with women, is that all the women were taught how to pretend. Manipulate their inner cues to be able to tolerate the outer ‘reality’. Manipulate, too, the outer circumstances so people think their lives are “perfect”. Yet our inner world is in total and utter turmoil. So is that of our children.

Wise words by a wise woman: "I'm not settling for half of anything!"

I can never be more intimate with another than I have given myself permission to be with myself. In that, I must be in willing to be with my own disagreements inside myself to the point where I integrate the double binds and anchors and lies. I must choose to remain comfortable in my discomfort of not-knowing and uncertainty yet give myself permission to BE in all that IS. I must create enough space inside myself to hold all the paradoxical truths as equally real in order to integrate them. I must be willing to take sacred responsibility, inside myself, about my contribution to the external reality I am living.

Curiosity, on the other hand, is an open ended state of being. “I don’t know” is a powerful, legitimate state of being that invites the unknown to become known. It is the state of creativity, of expansion, of evolution. It demands that we surrender that which we think we know in order to discover what it is that we yet don’t know.It is in the yet unknown that potential and possibility live.It is in the yet unknown that resourcefulness emerges from.

What does it take to create sustainably that which light you up?"Creation from Crone energy feels very different, very certain, very unshakable. It's the ability to see the much larger picture, the greater context within which my creations unfold, and trusting that because they are creations of deep RIG (respect, integrity and generosity of Spirit) and joy, they are sustainable. They are creations that make my heart skip a beat when I think about having created them. That another looks at it and does not see what I see is entirely irrelevant to me... " 

So, this mother's best advice to my three year old? Be yourself, and tell the truth! Notice where you deny, defend, dismiss, avoid. Notice where you think you know best. Notice where you hook yourself to an illusion to try and sustain the status quo of your life. Notice when that's no longer serving you. Notice your unfolding mindfully in every breath, and choose every choice consciously. Seek the higher order truth that's beckoning to be revealed to you, and you will find it ... over and over and over ... 

There is an "I AM" only inside of us that knows our own unique truth, independent of what anyone else believes. It is much harder to access that unless and until we begin to notice that we are distinct and separate from our mother, our sister, our husbands, our children.  The only question remaining to explore is: are you willing to discover who YOU are?

Together in conversation in The Joy of Decay Podcast with Tessa Rae, we explore topics that matter to women's souls. We talk about our journey through WEL-Systems® experiences, decloaking to ourselves and living authentic lives, parenting, the power of the Crone, grief, intimacy, provocation to expand beyond our limits, and so much more! Have a listen ...

If I achieve one goal in my lifetime, I wish it to be that you grow up knowing your true Self, your essence, your I AM. It is only by knowing this that you do not fall victim to another's construction of the world. If you notice the patterns playing out in the world and choose mindfully that which is meaningful for you, I know you will be okay.  I share these thoughts with you because I have come to discover that there is nothing in the world that is more powerful than you knowing your essence... your truth ... yourSelf.