The Shrunken Blue Cardigan & the Choice to Let Go
The catalyst to personal evolution can often be something totally unexpected.
Who could have predicted, for instance, that a shrunken blue cardigan would lead to such tremendous transformation of trauma in my body?! While I could not have predicted it, I know, there are no accidents in the universe.
Briefly, for context, this is what happened: my favourite cardigan was “accidentally” placed in the dryer by a man I dearly adore the day after the first conversation with Sheila Winter Wallace on manifesting a meaningful life through the wisdom of The Kybalion, two days after my son “accidentally” scratched me in the cornea of my eye. Ouch!
Suffice it to say, with or without my permission, my body released a lot of water through my eyes in the last few days, both to heal the scratched cornea and to mourn the shrunken state of my favourite cardigan.
Quantum TLC™
When the anger and grief around the cardigan presented itself, I was unsure of what was going on. My first instinct was to distract myself by going to wash some dishes. At some point, I realized that there was a deep desire to cry, so I left the sink full of dirty dishes and walked over to the couch. I knew I didn’t want to distract myself, and I felt I shouldn’t need to cry. In that moment, I decided that I would cry, because my body demanded it, even if I could not make sense of it. Instead of shutting my body down, as one normally does in these situations, I engaged in the life altering experience of Quantum TLC™, which essentially means letting go of the intellect and (by focusing on relaxing the body) and allowing the body to do what it is designed to do, without stopping it and without judgement. That is how my body stabilizes. That is how it reaches homeostasis. That is how I heal.
Because a part of me knew that this level of upset was not warranted over the cardigan, I stayed curious about what was presenting. In my externally-perceived hysteria I wondered: what is it that’s going on in my body, in this moment? This line of inquiry led to a profoundly liberating realization: I was mourning all that which had been taken from me without my permission, the reminiscence of which still lived in my body. Turns out, the cardigan was just the catalyst.
Interesting. …I wonder, how many ways has this presented in my life before and I have just silenced it or ignored it? There is always so much more than meets the eye, layers upon layers upon layers…
How I experience life is interesting when I choose to engage differently …
In my consciously choosing to trust my body and actively let go of and release historical crap I had no use for, I came through the other side more free. I have no name for what was released, no story attached to it. What I have is the energetic framework that has now left my body (and, there’s always more!). I know, to some this might sound very strange, because we live in a world that conditions us to believe that the way to move through discomfort and dis-ease is to tell the story, over an over, until our intellect gets it so sufficiently that…well, the body just follows. Or, worse yet, we suppress the intelligence of the body by taking increasingly more powerful drugs. From my personal experience, none of these methods have ever worked and I have always found myself trapped in the history of my mundane existence.
Today, I chose to cry in a different way than I had been used to; not to release the feelings in the moment, but to cry from the choice point of an emerging future. To me, this means I consciously chose to give my body the permission it needed to move stuff around so that new neurological pathways replaced the old, focusing on the now and moving forward.
Like I said, I have no idea what I released — I have no concrete example. And, I trust that my body knows. I can feel the release and the newfound freedom in my body. I can feel it in the love of life I feel today, in this moment.
The Power of Alchemy
To me, that is the power of a magical being. Intimately and intuitively knowing, I AM the flow of life moving through this body, and so my body takes its instructions from ME. And the brilliant quantum biological processor that the body is, processes information in flow beautifully so that homeostasis is reached. By ignoring the call of the intellect to shut down the “unreasonable” flow of tears and allowing my body to lead, my body found the signatures of “loss” in my nervous system and overall being and released them upward and externally, through my tears, in flow. Now that my body has stabilized, I AM a more enlivened being! Realizing, what presents is never about the content, per se, but the context it reveals and represents.
Truth of it is, water was going to continuously flow through my eyes regardless (because, well…have you ever had your cornea scratched? … I don’t recommend it). It was my choice to stand in the NOW and choose to engage with my tears not from an intellectual and judgmental point of history, but from that of choosing my emerging future, now. Choosing to trust my body to lead in the process of letting go of old programming and create new pathways for itself. After all, I know all the body is doing when manifesting discomfort and dis-ease is trying to get our attention so that we may re-direct it back into homeostasis.
There are no accidents in a living, conscious, holographic universe. There simply cannot be.
Question is: are we paying attention?