Sensuality & Shame
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The process outlined in this photo demands first: trust the body.
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I am always so intrigued and in love with the expressed sensuality of little ones.
To be in the presence of that expression of Innocence, rejoicing in discovery, is a sacred gift. It is a reminder of how simple it could be, how joyous, how immensely precious.
And, simultaneously, it is a reminder of just how fucking few people are allowed to rejoice in it. It is a reminder of everything that has been taken from most children. And now, most of them living in adult bodies, taking from their children that which was taken from them. Innocence taken, takes. Innocence violated, violates. So the cycle goes. Until one day, one sacred being awakens to their essence (truth), and then … that game is over. (And this is exactly WHY I do what I do...)
There's a point to having a body.
This afternoon, I was laying with my son. He put his arms around my neck, my face smooched in his. In that moment of sensuality, shared, I viscerally grok THE point of being alive and having a body. In that shared moment of sensing intimacy, delighting to be alive in this human body, I know what’s possible.
Human touch is magical. Our nervous system is magical. Our ability to take the massiveness of it all in and delight in it, is magical.
Yet how many of us know how to give ourselves permission to immerse our full selves in the moment and rejoice in such delight? How many of us give ourselves permission to feel the immensity of all the sensations viscerally?
The body is the only device that can process the flow of sensations that move through it. That’s THE point of having a body; otherwise we could just be consciousness, floating and never know what it’s like to delight in physical sensation.
Yet here we are, beings of light, made of stardust.
Cultural interference.
Where all the static comes from...
Interesting, isn’t it? Those delightful sensations of the body are the first cultures worldwide try to eradicate. They bombard into our heads that if it feels good, it’s wrong. If it feels good, it’s shameful. And if we lean into that which feels good, we are to be ashamed for who we are. And then, we are to spend the rest of our lives hiding who we are, afraid that someone might find out.
The fucking irony is that anyone who dares to (re)discover the essence of who they are rejoices in it. Delights in it. Immerses their being in it.
But. “They” intentionally confuse and gaslight us from the moment we are born so we don’t know if up is down and down is up. And now with the prevalence of physical interventions (drugs, drugs, drugs), it is becoming increasingly harder to hear the voice of Truth (impulse, intuition, bulshit-detector) inside each of us.
But that’s “out there”. I do not have to be captive to that ideology just because I don't know what else to do.
"How else, then, shall I live?"
...is one of my favourite questions ...
I live my life viscerally knowing: our bodies are the only devices capable of processing energy, sensations, feelings (hence, quantum-biological). That is their only purpose: to be the conduit through which the consciousness that I AM has a visceral experience, and everything that comes along with that. We are supposed to rejoice in intimacy; we are supposed to delight in sensuality; we are supposed to ride the waves of orgasms galore; we are supposed to elate in our state of spiritual bliss.
And yet, for most of us, our ability to rejoice and delight in the sensations in our body has been coupled with some derivative of shame. As if our sensuality is wrong. As if our sexuality is wrong. As if our spirituality is wrong.
For whatever reason (unclear to me), in this timeline of this space we have chosen to experience life from, up is down and down is up and torpedo a thousand tornados all around and see where you land! And the most interesting part? If you notice it and question it, YOU are crazy.
So be it.
Because I know.
And I am unwilling to pretend that I don’t.
Even though the status quo would much prefer that I stay docile, complacent and compliant, I know that the conditioning is not for my own good. How could it be? After all, we live in a world where our body, the perfect quantum-biological processing device, has been systematically targeted for thousands of years as the source of shame. Cultural conditioning for thousands of years has brutalized every living human body in an effort to normalize the profane and shun the sacred. Gaslighting, at its finest.
But I know: any form of manipulation only works so long as we are willing to continue to allow it. It works so long as we are willing to pretend we are blind to it. It only works so long as we are willing to capitulate our truth in favour of the illusion (the lie).
While it need not be this way, it continues to be…because we allow it.
Yet, when we awaken to the vibration of the manipulation and we allow ourselves to really feel the immensity of what it feels like to have been intentionally duped, we can begin to let go of the grip of the illusion and begin the reclamation of Truth (aka healing) process.
What hurts, ladies and gentleman, is not the reality of our situation, but our profound attachment to wanting it to be not-so.
In other words, what hurts us is our resistance to what is. We want the people around us to be different. We want our relationships to be different. We want our lives to be different. We want our governments to be different. We want our social systems to be different. We want our workplaces to be different. We want everything else to be different.
Yet we want us to remain the same (ah, damn the weight of taking responsibility for our own lives).
Yet we keep trying to find strategies to tolerate the intolerable, and calling it something else (no wonder women are mad).
Our habituated and historical ways of living are not working. They will never get us to where we say we want to be. How do we know that? Because, 1. they haven’t. And 2. the screams in our body have not stopped, no matter the strategies to numb, escape, …tolerate.
Resistance is always futile.
Flow is our natural state of being; nothing is meant to stay stagnant. Nothing is meant to stay the same. Our worldview is supposed to change. Our relationships are supposed to change. Our lives are supposed to change. There are seasons for everything. Rhythms and cycles. Each follows a pattern, and each is infinitely unique. Each moment. Each breath. Each sensation.
I say lean in to each moment with divine curiosity, because that is your birthright.
I say lean in to each perceived challenge with immense trust, because you are so much more than you believe you are.
I say lean in with your body, because it is THE only device that can never *ever* lie to you. Never. Everything else, most definitely can … and has been.
Your body is your most precious ally.
So if you think your body has been betraying you, wait till you discover in how many ways you’ve been betraying your body. It will shock you, at first, and then, in a breath, it will free you. Because your body is incredibly forgiving.
It wants you to feel the immensity of what it means to be alive! Literally, that is its only purpose. It is an organic, living collection of a brilliant cooperative ecosystem designed specificallyfor you to have a visceral experience of what it’s like to be a human, on this planet, at this time. Everything in your body benefits when you lean in to what feels good (and by that I mean congruent to the bone, not short-term escape or numbing or busying or whatever people do to not feel).
The more intimate we become with the processes of the body, the more freedom we invite into our lives. We are here to feel absolutely all of it. We are here to rejoice in absolutely all of it. We are here to delight in absolutely all of it. We are here to live in joy, because it is our birthright. And everything else? Well, it is all an invitation to lean in, surrender, and listen …
What is your higher order calling, in this moment?
How willing are you to hear it?
How able are you to hear it?
Willingness is all yours; ability can be taught. Are you curious to find out how?
If so, I’ll see you in my inbox.
I invite you to satiate your appetite; don’t manage it.
Dieting has never worked, anyways.
RESOURCES TO CONSIDER
If you are wondering about how to shed your internalized shame and begin to reclaim your sensuality so you begin to finally enjoy living, I invite you to start with the "Sexual, Sensual, Spiritual Beings" audio files.
As always, THE starting point for all conversations from this paradigm start with the "Decloaking and Living Authentically" audio files. First CD, which contextualizes what this journey is all about, is free.